A Genderless Child

Dear sister,

Please accept the most sincere greetings on such wonderful news. I am happy to share your parenting journey and, of course, you may rely on my support. I am sure that baby Z will be a valuable new member of our family. To be honest, your letter is filled with positive vibes and assertiveness in your aspirations. At the same time, the path that you have chosen for your child did not surprise me. I believe you have realistic expectations about the challenges you might encounter in the future. I have no doubts that you know how to tackle them.

I agree that our appearance determines the way we are treated in society. Our sex sets by default the borders, into which we have to fit – male or female. Furthermore, it defines the activities, behavior, and other attributes which society decides are appropriate for that category. Society assigns us with a role that we are obliged to perform during the whole lifetime. Whenever we fail to excel at it, we are judged. Trying too hard – still judged. I really praise your courage and perseverance on this rocky road.

I find it very inspirational to let baby Z choose whom to be in the future regardless of sex. I am sure that you know that baby Z will struggle with identifying its own identity and personality at some point. This time will require support for baby Z from our side. You know that pedagogical methods always emphasize on the importance of individuality; however, individuality is based only on gender categories. Schools call for the personality development but bullying, harassment, and discrimination are the most peculiar drawbacks of almost all educational institutions. I think this is amazing to let baby Z build its own self. This strategy will help develop leadership, resourcefulness, and self-awareness.

Our society misinterprets individuality and gender equality. We are all eager to provide equal opportunities to everyone, but most of the times, our intentions are deep-seeded in stereotyping and social stigma. Have you noticed that when a man performs female duties, he is considered weak? However, a female doing man’s job is considered strong. The global campaign for the women’s empowerment has raised the awareness worldwide; furthermore, it contributed to the man-hating attitudes. You are giving baby Z an opportunity to discover the real world of equal opportunities without barriers.

Besides personal struggles, there also will be people who will not understand you and will try to insist on their own truth. From the legislative point of view, mentally our society is not ready for adopting an undefined gender category. You have to be a male or female to go to school or to acquire an ID. It is our government that is in charge of the intellectual development. How is this possible when we are limited by being either A or B? The global message is clear – intellectual development and human rights are of the main priority. It is only a theory, however. In practice, it is not possible to implement this noble idea.

I think it will require time for people to understand that social standards and culture are subject to evolution, as well. I think people tend to know exactly, with whom they are dealing and that is why baby Z might have challenges with social interactions. For toddlers, it takes one smile to start a friendship. The real struggle will appear when baby Z will reach the pre-school and elementary school age. However, I think much of the concerns will originate from the parents who are peasants by some social standards and will try to isolate their own children from baby Z.

There will always be people who will judge your decision, there will always be those who will find it interesting, and there will always be individuals who will support your decision. You are going to give to baby Z more than a life filled with immense love, support, friendship, and endless opportunities. You are going to give a tool for creating unique individuality, own decisions, and power to change this world. People like baby Z represent our future tomorrow. I am sure that baby Z will make us all proud of it.

Sincerely yours,

Related Free Personal Essays